Just fine

What can I say? Everything is just fine, no complaint, nothing. Isn't that just great? I guess the people I've met and talked to these last days have helped me to see my situation in a new and refreshing view. That doesn't mean there is no problem or anyone having problems in my neighbourhood, quite the opposite. But I'll be ever so happy to be of any help if I can and I trust God to do what He can which is more than I can dream or think of. Wow. I'm glad I got this down because I think I will need to read it another day... :-)

Ache

Somehow it is there all the time. Between my shoulders and sometimes in my chest. The places differ but the ache goes on and on. Where does it come from? I'm not sure really, it can be everything that is going on in my life. According to my last post in this blog, I'm very happy about it. And that is also true.

But apart from what I wrote, I'll be without a home in August. And where do I want to live, if here in Stocholm, how? Alone or sharing, big or cheap or do I even have a choice? Then there is my little company, how will I survive? I don't get all the days I aim for at the bus-garage. And then, love, can I love again, what do I fear? I have actually never had a good and lasting relationship. Maybe I'm unable to love and be loved? I don't think so, but in my darkest hours that comes to mind. Please God, help me to dare.

Life is good

Really, it is not often in my life, when I can say; life is good. I mean it isn't that everything is wrong all the time. But there is always some things that triggers my frustration somehow. It can be that there is too much to do or too little, or work feels unpleasant or church is too much engagement or too little time with friends or too much social life. Well, there can be a lot...But right now I feel like it is a kind of balance. I plan most of my time myself, work with what I want to and when I want to.. I have the time I need for Church engagements and fellowship, I do have lovely friends around and my parents in a handy distance; close enough to visit when in need of a decent dinner and to play Chicago. And a wonderful man close and far away. Which means he lives far away, but he is close through phone-calls and e-mails and text-messages. Life is good, thank you God.

Holiday on ice

Sometimes it is easy to walk on water. You don't need much faith to take the first step, even though it might give a feeling of butterflies in your stomach. That is when the lake or sea has frozen over. When you really need faith is when the water is open and cold, a storm is moving in. Who wants to take a step out on the water then? Well, this is all about faith, I know, you can't really walk on water. Sorry, how banal! But I think that sometimes God gives you a feeling of a frozen lake to help you take the first step out...will the ice hold for you?

Tjuvhålsundet, Luleå

Happy new year

Katarina kyrka på nyårsnatten

I think it is great with a chance to summon up a part of life and then to start something new. On the other hand that is something I do all the time.. I'm a bit of a nerd with that :-) What I have problems with is the new year. I think that I'm not really into the thing of expecting something of myself or others. Circumstances are things that you yourself don't have any power over. The only power you have is how to meet them. Good or bad I hope for myself that I count with God in everything that I meet this year. That is something I expect.